Public Speaking Proverb Fortune Cookie HumorPublic Speaking Proverb Fortune Cookie Humor

(Note: Determine if this is politically correct for your audience.)

You can throw in a cute diversion to a boring public speaking engagement by attributing a saying to an ancient Chinese philosopher. Since these sayings are not attributed to anyone in particular, feel free to change or update them to fit your situation and to enhance their humor.

(The term 'original' here means as original as something can be after being recited and translated for several hundred years.)

Original: You cannot prevent the birds of sadness from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from nesting in your hair.

Update: You cannot prevent the birds of sadness from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from pooping on your Gucci blazer.

Original: He who walk on eggs should tread lightly.

Update: He who walk on eggs should find out the price per dozen.

Original: People who live in glass houses should not throw stones.

Update: People who live in glass houses should pull down the blinds.

by Tom Antion
References and Bibliography

Copyright ? 1998 - 2005 Advanced Public Speaking Institute

Tom Antion provides entertaining speeches and educational seminars. He is the ultimate entrepreneur, having owned many businesses BEFORE graduating college. Tom is the author of the best selling presentation skills book "Wake 'em Up Business Presentations" and "Click: The Ultimate Guide to Electronic Marketing." It is important to Tom that his knowledge be not only absorbed, but enjoyed. This is why he delivers his speeches laced with great humor and hysterical jokes. Tom has addressed more than 87 different industries and is thoroughly committed to his clients' needs.

Advanced Public Speaking Institute
3105 Sergin Ct.
Virginia Beach, VA 23452
(757) 431-1366
Fax (757) 431-2050
Visit our Blog at

Rated:NR/0 Votes
Add To My Article Reading List
Add To My Article Reading List
Print Article
More Article By Tom Antion
More Article by Tom Antion
More Articles From Public Speaking
More Articles From Public Speaking
Related Articles and Readings
Benefits and Cons of Having Glass Doors By: Adriana J. Noton
There are many different materials that entry ways are made out of, such as, wood, metal and glass You can use any of these types of materials depending on the function and style of the house or ...
Bring the Outdoors Inside With Sliding Glass Doors By: Adriana Noton
Glass doors give any house or apartment the air of openness They increase the amount of sunlight in a room for a brighter ...
Glass By: Jason Gluckman
History indicates that glass has been in use since the Stone Age. Around 7500 BCE glass in its natural form, obsidian, was utilized to fashion tools. Detailed descriptions on glass-blowing techniques were documented as early as 1500 BCE in Egypt. The Egyptians used glass to glaze pottery before it was ...
The Perks of Having Stained Glass Windows For Your Home By: Steve Blomberg
Every part of your home contains a certain emotion that would definitely make you feel your best Stained glass usually brings a remarkable ...
Stained Glass 101: Types And Methods Of Production By: James Greensit
It was between the 10th and 11th centuries when the use of stained glass has reached its peak It was also during these times when glass factories started to be established and this is when the glass-making process was finally honed to almost ...
The information provided in this article and/or the comments is the sole responsibility of their respective authors and does not necessarily reflect the opinion of  does not endorse any article and/or comments published by our web users unless otherwise noted. 

Member Panel

login to submit articles and more


  • » Active Categories: 419
  • » Active Articles:252609
  • » Active Authors:31915
  • » Active Members: 38222
  • » Statistics Updated:
    - Thu May 7th, 2020 12:50AM EST