Changing Your AttitudeChanging Your Attitude

Changing Your Attitude

by Connie H. Deutsch

The older I get, the more difficult I find it to be in the constant presence of people who are habitually negative. Considering the type of work I do, it's often difficult to remove myself from their presence but sometimes it's a matter of survival.

We all have obstacles in our path; life isn't perfect and we don't live in a perfect world but most of us can find a little joy some of the time. It's the people whose negative attitudes never change that I'm finding progressively difficult to be around. When I was younger, I was less affected by people who always saw the glass half-full but now that I'm so much older and have experienced so much of life, I find their constant negativity to be unbearable.

I used to feel sorry for people who never seemed to find any joy in life, even if their lives were going well. I once asked a man if his mother embraced happiness when things were going well for her and his reply was that if she suddenly acquired a million dollars, instead of being grateful and happy for the money she received, she would be worrying about the taxes she would have to pay on it.

You can always spot the ones who continually have pity parties for themselves but it's much harder to spot them when they walk around smiling at everyone and pretending to be sociable. If you're extremely sensitive, their negative vibrations feel like they're piercing your soul and, after a while, it feels like you are bleeding internally.

I have known people who couldn't rejoice at their own successes. For some reason, they can't feel that sense of wonder and gratitude for what they have; they're always looking to the next thing, or they might momentarily be grateful for what they have today but forget all the things they should be grateful for that have happened for the last ten years.

We all have moments of despair, regrets for some of the mistakes we've made, unwise decisions that have cost us dearly but, somehow, we get over them and move on. But the people who carry the mantle of negativity around them as if it were a shroud, never seem to go beyond it.

Situational unhappiness is part of our lives. Life is not one big happy party. There are times when we experience deep sadness and feelings of unworthiness or being inept, but after a while, we learn to pick ourselves up and find something to be happy about and something at which we can succeed and for which we can rejoice.

It's the people who never try to be happy, even when they have every reason to be happy, whose presence are difficult to endure. As I said, when I was younger, their negativity didn't affect me so acutely. Now that I'm so much older and see the real suffering that some people have to endure, that I have less patience for the people who don't let themselves enjoy life and be grateful for what they do have.

by Connie H. Deutsch
References and Bibliography
Connie’s books: Whispers of the Soul, A Slice of Life, Whispers of the Soul for the Rest of Your Life, View from the Sidelines, Reaching for the Brass Ring of Life, Here and There, The Counseling Effect...and more. Visit website: to Read more Connie H Deutsh Articles
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