Should All Lawyers Be KilledShould All Lawyers Be Killed

Some cling to the Shakespearian line by Caesar who said; ?First thing we do is kill all lawyers,? as a possible solution to the abundance of frivolous lawsuits which are filed each year with fictitious claims full of pure and utter hokum. Even the wisest of men who seek such advice to remove this cancer from our society hold short when asked; ?Should all lawyers actually be killed?? In fact many of the most intellectual members of our society believe that we should not kill all the lawyers. Instead they believe it would be a smart concept to leave a few, as in maybe three, perhaps four, although that is somewhat pushing it a bit.

Whereas some would say this is a completely ridiculous argument for killing 500,000 innocent attorneys, one might say, we are not talking about killing 500,000 lawyers, but rather 499,996 or 499,997 lawyers not a half a million of them. And we have not even said how this should be done. One man suggested that we put all the bad lawyers in a concentration camp and all the good ones on a ship. We then blow up the camp so no one will feel anything, it will be instantaneous. You see? This is very humane. Then when we are sure they are all gone. We take three life preservers and sink the ship in the middle of the ocean. If any of the good lawyers make it back, they can tour the country in a cage so we can teach children growing up what to never become. It actually makes perfect sense. Think about it.

by Lance Winslow
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